five years

i was inspired recently by a quote from my brother's band mate in regards to the idea of following your heart... he said something to the effect of "chasing what is good, regardless of where the road is taking you." instantly i thought of my love...

kirby and i met, started dating... six months later he said to me (in the kitchen of his apartment) "so, do you ever think we should just probably get married?" i said "yes." three months later, i said "yes" again...in my parent's backyard in a white dress.

i was looking for you...

kirby quit his job and we took most of our wedding gift money and went to europe for 6 weeks. we rode around on trains and lost stuff, i sprained my ankle on the steps in sorrento and we wandered through the woods in assisi at night because we refused to sleep apart...and the hostel had no co-ed rooms left. kirby's beard grew to extreme lengths, we wore a few staple clothing items in rotation, got lost, got found...

on the lawn under the tower of pisa

sitting in between the cars on a train. there were no empty seats

when we got home we moved in with my parents while he found a job and i found an apartment. we slept in my old bedroom in my twin bed.

then kirby got a job at a mental health clinic making $13.50 an hour. we were so happy. we found 500 sq feet to live in at csun's family housing.

we left our protestant faith and became roman catholic.
we got pregnant with our first baby one month later...

leaving our first apartment.

2.3.

we have been poor...we have been "rich" (which, was still actually poor) we have had negative account balances, we have eaten lots of peanut butter and jelly sandwich's. lots.

to most of the world, especially in our culture... this is all stupid. it is stupid, irresponsible, crazy... we should be divorced, we probably will be divorced, why are you having "all" these kids?! get a better job, get a better degree... this will never last.

i say this life is lovely. it is romantic, poetic, beautiful, passionate and filled to the brim with love and laughs and it is for ever and always.

our culture tends to discourage living this way and that is sad and unfortunate. unfortunate for all of those that are afraid to make "insane" choices for fear of failure...or because it's what your "supposed to do." oh... how many miss out on the good stuff.

i am proud that we chased what was good, my love.
we have a love story. and i am proud to pass this on to our children, to encourage them to really, really spend their days on this earth chasing the things that are good. the things that make this life good. i am proud to care for our home and our babies. i am proud to take care of you.
i really, actually love you more today than five years ago today.



you are magic to me.
and i will still eat peanut butter and jelly sandwich's with you. happily.

this song... is ours.