Wednesday, August 13, 2014

68

Between loads of catch-up laundry, general post-trip malaise, and trying to figure out what that weird smell is in our fridge, I've been processing my weekend with Dallas and the other 99 ladies at The Hundred.

I could write an entire post on the weirdness of getting on a plane alone, on how un-a mom I (felt like I...) looked on the outside, compelling me to awkwardly reassure all and any stranger's that I do in fact have kids at home and I never do things like this and I even homeschool!! and I'm leaving my baby home alone for the first time CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS?? (blink blink blink blink)

I could write about the excitement I felt to meet some dear friends that I've only ever e-known. Or how I jumped right into boundary-less friend mode by wearing Grace's dress AND bra AND using her deodorant the very first night. Or how I slept through the Saturday breakfast even though my roommate swears she try to wake me in her "loud voice." -__-

(dress cred: Grace P., bra cred: Grace P., deodorant cred: Grace P.)




I could write about the genuine loveliness of everyone I encountered, or the food (the foooodd), or the talks, or the swag, or drinking champagne and trying on clothes in the presidential suite with Kendi... um..... . . ! I was impressed with every detail. It was as if this conference had been honed and perfected over years. It was gorgeous. Gorgeous.




At the farewell brunch, Lauren stood up to announce they had one final surprise for us. We were instructed to pop the balloon attached to our chair and find the number hidden inside. This would determine the order in which we could go to claim a final gift they had sneakily set out on a few tables covered in goodies in the adjoining room. My number was 68. And I found it fitting, in my post-Hundred glow, as I sorted through my thoughts, that 68 was the number I drew.

Because, I felt a little like a 68. I felt a little in over my head. A little lower on the totem pole, and even a little silly at times. I wasn't a 1 or even a 20. I was a 68. I was a blogger who was having a relatively new experience, I was (am) fumbling and unaware of what I'm doing or why. I found myself responding with "Oh, just this little mom-blog, it's not a big deal" when asked what my blog was all about. I felt like I should probably be standing at the end of the line.

Do not get me wrong. This weekend was filled to the brim with information, and interaction, and countless other incredible things. It wasn't The Hundred, it was me. (Except for that I wasn't breaking up with it.)

I heard words like brand and niche and audience and it made think about how I have nooooo idea. I have none! In fact, this whole blogging experience over the past few months has felt a bit like a wave I am trying to swim towards without dipping under or running out of steam. And I love it. I love hashing things out here and sharing our life and ranting and typoing. I love it. But I don't quite know how it fits just yet, I don't quite know what it is.

If I were in any other scenario- fashion blogger, style blogger, blogging for business, not being so unaware, etc- I think the terminology would have inspired me. But, honestly, it scared me at first. It made me wonder if I had stepped into this other world that I just wasn't ready for. I knew Monday morning would still be a pot of oatmeal, and organizing curriculum, and googling "how to remove beach tar from skin." It would just be life. And this blog would be a part of it, but it would be a second part. I wondered if conferencing meant it was more, and I didn't think I wanted that even if it were true.

But I should have seen it sooner.

What I realized over the course of the weekend was that mostly everyone there would face a pot of oatmeal on Monday morning. That we were all there trying to sort out the exact same thing. Who to be, as a blogger. And how to be it.


I'm not extra special because I'm number 68. I'm just the number after 67 and the one before 69.

And the conclusions I came to are these: authenticity is really super easy to preserve because all you have to do is not be a lame jerk. I don't have to do anything I don't want to do. I can keep doing whatever I want to do. I can never have a brand. Or care. And that's fine. I will still make oatmeal on a Monday morning.

This weekend also got me thinking about partnering with brands here and there. And that's another layer of scary and yikes and teeth-clenched and should I do it? I didn't know if it would fit or if it could fit here, but then I remembered (again) that this gets to be anything. And what matters to me is that it is authentic and that it's awesome. I'm realizing that what I want is not so much a sponsor me for as it is something rad for you. If someone, somewhere wants to give me something because of this blog- I want to give it to you. Because you're the ones here, moving this whole thing along.

It's not an original concept. It's just what I saw Lauren, Grace, Megan, and Bridget do when they told us to pop those balloons on Sunday morning. It was a thank you.

So, this week I am brainstorming and thinking hard about how to incorporate some thank you's into this little slice of internet. I'm contacting a few awesome brands and putting together my own little swag bag for you guys, inspired by what I learned in Dallas. I promise it'll be things I actually care about. Products that are really, really great by people that are really, really great. If my plan unfolds how I hope it will, I'll have a swagged out table of awesome for you all to grab from from time to time. It should be good.

Other concrete goals include 1. Continued not-lameness, 2. Getting myself to The Hundred again next year 3. Convincing you to come, too and 4. Taking better photos.

Here is my first go at #4. My laundry room on Monday morning. YOU'RE WELCOME. @__@


(all other photos by Awake Photography and J Noel Photography)

29 comments:

  1. So glad you had an amazing time, because it looked amazing!
    And I felt the exact same way when I flew by myself to Texas, "I'm a mom with five kids, I rarely wear things other than yoga pants, how am I flying to another country alone to do something that only involves me??" Does. Not. Compute.

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  2. Hi Blythe! Found your blog after seeing your Soul Pancake interview, loved it! What a wonderful weekend for you too and can't wait to see what you add to your blog. You have a style and calmness about you that is a wonderful witness to Catholic family life!

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  3. Just found you through Camp Patton's blog. I was just diagnosed with thyroid issues and she blogged you are a thyroid cancer survivor! Looking forward to reading more :)

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    1. So sorry to hear that!! Hope you are on the mend? xo

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  4. This was awesome. And so are you and your insanely cute family:)

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  5. Conor's cameo might have been a scene stealer ;) but this is great stuff. For one, you are off to a great start with your photography. As I gaze at the piles of laundry to fold on my bed... Anyway, it speaks to me.

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  6. My sweet 68...I feel for the "roommate" 😴.

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  7. The Hundred sounds like an amazing event/weekend. Could we lobby for a California location next year?! Did you find the answer for the tar on foot problem? We use baby oil, works like a charm! :) Also, are you kidding me with Katrina's hair in that picture? Frickin' amazing!! Can't wait to see where your blog goes, you deserve all of the opportunities coming your way.

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    1. California. YES. I would vote the biggest of yes' for that. I used coconut oil (similar!) and Katrina's hair... I know, I know. Grace posted a pic of us and I love it bc it looks like her hair is mine. Fakin'! No shame;)

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    2. I third the California request!

      This was very refreshing to read. I long ago realized that the stress of trying to *be* a something-blog just was not me. I'm far too weird and out there for that. So I thank you for the pep talk on authenticity because I think that's what's most important in... well, in everything!

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    3. I am voting California because...duh. ANd Blythe! You were SOOOO sweet and lovely and I am so glad you came and that I got to meet you and chat with you for a bit!

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    4. Jumpin' in here with another vote for CALIFORNIA! And Blythe, I so loved everything you said. In some ways, I even felt a lot like that after the Edel Gathering (in terms of blogging). <3 <3

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  8. I spent naptime reading about ISO and aperture today, so I'm feeling WAY WAY legit now. WAY.

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    1. WAY!!! You are like a 17, at least. AT LEAST.

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  9. I love you, Blythe. And I love this: "all you have to do is not be a lame jerk." I felt so inspired about the brand stuff too that I just want to get cool things for my readers--really--for my e-friends. Just gather them up so they can have that amazingness of sweet gifts too.

    Bra & dress & deodorant? LOVE IT. Going through major you & everyone withdrawal.

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  10. I am SO happy you were able to go!!! Love the photos of you there. I love you (duh) and your blog (which I've been reading since '09... 5 years what?!?) and I am behind you wherever you go on the interwebs. Can't wait to see what's in store for The Fike Life.
    And, sign me up for next year's hundred! I promise to yell really loudly so you don't miss breakfast.

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  11. Looks precisely like my laundry room! Except maybe some baskets to trip over should be thrown halfway in the hallway. Loved reading your perspective on The Hundred.

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  12. Love the laundry room pic. Sharing that stuff is probably the exact way not to become a lame jerk. Also, you are so super gorgeous in all these pics!

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  13. Wonderful. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us. :)

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  14. Blythe, I love it here as well..whatever you do I'm sure it will be awesome! BTW - I was SHOCKED to not get my usual chuckle from your naked-kid-backyard-garden-picture-logo" (a semi-serious blogger term I hope you don't mind) but it didn't last long -- I love the new pic!! :)

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  15. What a beautiful post! So glad I got the pleasure of meeting you and your sweet blog:)

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  16. awww, sounds like so much fun! Also: those the BEST types of new friendships! (the kind that include sharing deodorant and clothing, I mean ;)
    xox
    giedre

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  17. I felt the same way. and I'm still processing it all, but the one thing I know for sure is that I'm glad I went, because I love the people I got to meet/see. you especially. (FIVE kids what???) hero, you are.

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  18. Ah, I love this. I totally agree with everything you said. It's just about opening up and giving to others... whether its with more time poured into this community or the occasional good. (I love the goodies.)

    Either way, I LOVED MEETING YOU. I can't wait to see you at the next Hundred!! xo :)

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  19. I just loved meeting you and I'm so happy we were seated together for the initial dinner thing. LOVED this post because I was #50 and that's exactly what I felt like. The middle. And I've felt like I've been stuck in the middle for so long. (And now The Middle by Jimmy Eat World is stuck in my head).

    I'm so excited to follow your adventures here. And if someone is taking notes, here's another vote for California! My mom lives there and I'd love to combine visits... and drop the kiddos off with her while I go to The Hundred 2.0. :0)

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  20. It's so nice to hear your perspective. I am a new blogger, and I struggle with knowing the direction of my little internet space too. I just know there's something about blogging that is fulfilling in a way I can't explain, and I want to do it for a long time. Also, love the laundry room shot :)

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  21. You have so much love bundled up into one little body, and blog! You are such an inspiration and listening to you talk about your children at the event was the greatest! You're a ROCKSTAR mom and I agree 10,000% that this past weekend was filled with excitement, one and a lifetime experiences, emotions and beauty. It was such a blessing to meet you and see you in person rather than behind a keyboard.

    Sincerely, Shelbi

    www.sincerelyshelbi.blogspot.com

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  22. Oh man, I am just trying to get past my period of mourning at missing this- the newborn is definitely helping- and that I keep telling myself "next year, next year". This post is so great and exactly how I feel about all these things but you have articulated it and made me think that maybe I can actually DO this. Thank you, dear Blythe.

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