Friday, October 21, 2016

All you need is love...

Today I found myself bumping along the worn gravel parking lot outside of a local K-mart. The boxed bassinet I had just purchased was filling the entirety of the child seat in my cart and Francis in his car seat filled the empty space behind it as we jostled and jumped along the old, cracked gravel towards our car. The day was hot and sunny and so I leaned around the big cardboard box to take a look at the baby- the package so large I couldn't even see him without craning my neck around the edge of it. He looked pretty unsettled as we bumped along. The street was more uneven than most and the cart was buzzing and humming with the sound of the metal on that pocked ground. I kept my eyes focused on him around the edge of the box as I pushed, cooing and shushing him as we rolled on towards the car. "We are almost there, baby, almost to the car, don't be sad..." over and over as I smiled reassuringly and kept his eyes on mine.

My first thought was, "This poor seventh baby..." always along for the ride with me, even in this hot, beat-up parking lot. He is such a good baby putting up with our crazy life- constantly awoken from naps and sitting in pee diapers way longer than any first child ever would... being nursed in the car, at the park, as I'm tying the shoe of a sibling, in the cold and in the heat.

And then I saw a bird's eye view of us in that moment as we bumped along with the cart and the box. That bassinet wasn't for Francis. He doesn't even have a bassinet. He has a moses basket on the floor next to our bed but he spends most of time on the bed, if I'm being honest. I've gotten used to that little perpetual drool stain on my sheets from all these babies over the years. And when we kick him out of our bed and the room he will move on to a little crib used by Clem, Pete and Joe before him, and from there to the run-down crib that Pete uses now. He will be the seventh baby to sleep in that crib if it doesn't fall apart by then.

The bassinet was for a baby released yesterday from a local NICU, for friends in a desperate emergency foster-to-adopt situation. You see there was a baby born, one month early. And while I bounced through the K-mart parking lot with his new bassinet in my cart, with my three-month old in his old, stained carseat, jostling along with me towards the car, I looked at my Francis and was overwhelmed with the awareness of how much I loved him. That he was loved. He was so deeply, deeply loved. Despite his hand-me-downs and his lack of stuff and his forever bouncing along with me as we bustle through the day, he has my love. And not only my love but Kirby's and his six siblings as well- not to mention our rich community of friends, his godparents, and his grandparents. In his home alone, he is deeply, intensely loved by 8 individuals. Who all want him... everyday. We all want him.

And he will have that, assuredly, for his entire life.

And then I thought of the baby for whom the empty bassinet was for. Born one month early and alone. God willing for not much longer but alone. And I was stunned in that moment at the frivolities of modern life. How silly and obsessive we can be over what we can or can't give our children. I've felt those feelings, too. Particularly at the start of my pregnancy with Francis. How can I give him what he needs with how much our life demands of me? With all the world tell us we've got to give? College tuition? After-school activities? Private school? Their own room? Toys? Clothes? Stuff??

Nothing.

In that moment in the parking lot under the sun, with that bassinet and my baby and his big blue eyes I realized that he has got it all. He's a king among babies. Because he is loved.

And, quite simply, that covers it.

All the superficialities that consume us as parents, all the demands we place on ourselves to give our kids "everything they need" or "everything they want"... it's all a fraud, wrought in our own consumption and insatiable thirst for more, better, more. It's conceived in the fear of our own failure and inability to love... again. It gestates in our obsession with cultural approval and wanting to avoid, at all costs, it's downward gaze at us and another one?! And the lie grows in us instead, and it takes up the space.

And more often than not, it keeps so many of us from the joy of giving our love away to another... to a new set of eyes to stare into in the K-mart parking lot, a new one to coo at and assure that the ride will be over soon, a new one to hold and to dress in hand-me-down clothes... and cribs... and things.

And, damn, are we missing out.

It's a reminder I need for myself- that despite all this there is love. There is always, always love.

And so we have it all.
And so we have all of it.



39 comments:

  1. My favorite of all your posts, ever. What a beautiful moment. Thank you for sharing.

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    Replies
    1. Hello, I am Theresa Williams After being in relationship with Anderson for years, he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to my friend and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem. email: drogunduspellcaster@gmail.com you can email him if you need his assistance in your relationship or any other Case.

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  2. Oh, Blythe. This post! Your clarity of what all is! To love and to be loved.

    Praying for that sweet baby. May he be wrapped in love as he is in prayer.

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  3. So, so good. What a sweet truth.

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  4. And so we have all of it.

    Amen. this is one of your best ever.

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  5. You've given voice to the sneaky thoughts that moms and thinking-about-becoming-moms have-- I am I enough? Do I have enough? What if I fail? Thank you for sharing about what really matters in motherhood. <3

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  6. Thank you, I love this and I love your writing.

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  7. Wow! This is so true and beautiful.

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  8. This is great! Thank you. Love this so much.

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  9. Thank you for this. So so true!

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  10. Thank you for this. So so true!

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  11. This is great- thanks for sharing! There is so much pressure to have more 'stuff'. Children show us clearly that love is what they really need. It's the most important thing :)

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  12. Francis is the king of babies because he has 6 brothers and sisters and you are the Queen of moms because you know what the real treasure is. Thank you for giving me something so uplifting to read today! So glad to hear from a woman who knows what she has is everything she wants.

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  13. Thinking of that baby born alone breaks my heart. I have never thought of babies in that situation before... in my mind their adoptive parents are always there, waiting. But I guess that's all too often not the case.

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  14. This is a beautiful post. Even more than recognizing that love is all you need, it the openness to see it. Some people never reach the point where they can accept that love is it, and you can have complete fulfillment from that alone. Not that life doesn't have its challenges. But moments can strike, and being fortunate enough to recognize them is a gift!
    The thought of a baby without the love of its mother makes me so sad! They are so innocent and the touch and love and smell of their mom is all they need (and some boob :))- I hope that baby finds some of that comfort. Thank you for helping!!

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  15. This is one of the greatest things I have ever read. Amen and amen.

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  16. I read your blog often and love your sense of humor and genuineness. This post made me cry, it's wonderfully written and so so true. Thank you for writing such a sweet post. I'm reading it right before work and it reminded me what's real.

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  17. Thank you for your miracle Doctor Osemu Okpamen

    This article is dedicated to the Doctor Osemu Okpamen. I have been married with my wife for 5 years and recently she broke up with me and it hurt me deeply when she told me to leave her alone and that she does not love me anymore when i was always faithful and honest to her. I tried all the ways to get her back buying her what she wants like i always did and she still left me heart broken and she even has a new boyfriend which destroyed me even more until a friend of mine from high school directed me to this genuine spell Doctor called Osemu Okpamen. This man changed my life completely. I followed everything he told me to do and my wife came back begging for me back. I was stunned everything happened exactly like he told me. I had faith in everything he told me and everything was true. Also he was there every moment until i got my happiness back and he also provides spells that cures impotence, bareness, diseases such as HIV/AID E.T.C You can contact him via email at { Doctorokpamenspelltemple@yahoo.com } or visit his website http://www.doctorokpamenspells.com. He will help you in anything you need and quick to answer once you contact him or call me for more info +1 (914)-517-3229...

    ReplyDelete
  18. Such beautiful words! I can't tell you how often these same thoughts occur to me in the midst of feeling overwhelmed by perceived inadequacy. Thank you for writing this.

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  19. This article is dedicated to the Doctor Osemu Okpamen. I have been married with my wife for 5 years and recently she broke up with me and it hurt me deeply when she told me to leave her alone and that she does not love me anymore when i was always faithful and honest to her. I tried all the ways to get her back buying her what she wants like i always did and she still left me heart broken and she even has a new boyfriend which destroyed me even more until a friend of mine from high school directed me to this genuine spell Doctor called Osemu Okpamen. This man changed my life completely. I followed everything he told me to do and my wife came back begging for me back. I was stunned everything happened exactly like he told me. I had faith in everything he told me and everything was true. Also he was there every moment until i got my happiness back and he also provides spells that cures impotence, bareness, diseases such as HIV/AID E.T.C You can contact him via email at { Doctorokpamenspelltemple@yahoo.com } or visit his website http://www.doctorokpamenspells.com. He will help you in anything you need and quick to answer once you contact him or call me for more info +1 (914)-517-3229.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I don't have any kids yet, but I just love your big, wild, crazy, sweet brood! People sometimes gasp when I say "Five kids sounds nice." But coming from a large extended family and having three sisters, I always feel like it's just more love to give and receive. Love, love this post!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Here are some key ingredients to the making of a long lasting love relationship Clarkson

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  22. Thank you for your miracle Doctor Osemu Okpamen

    This article is dedicated to the Doctor Osemu Okpamen. I have been married with my wife for 5 years and recently she broke up with me and it hurt me deeply when she told me to leave her alone and that she does not love me anymore when i was always faithful and honest to her. I tried all the ways to get her back buying her what she wants like i always did and she still left me heart broken and she even has a new boyfriend which destroyed me even more until a friend of mine from high school directed me to this genuine spell Doctor called Osemu Okpamen. This man changed my life completely. I followed everything he told me to do and my wife came back begging for me back. I was stunned everything happened exactly like he told me. I had faith in everything he told me and everything was true. Also he was there every moment until i got my happiness back and he also provides spells that cures impotence, bareness, diseases such as HIV/AID E.T.C You can contact him via email at { Doctorokpamenspelltemple@yahoo.com } or visit his website http://www.doctorokpamenspells.com. He will help you in anything you need and quick to answer once you contact him or call me for more info +1 (914)-517-3229.

    ReplyDelete
  23. i give thanks to jai mother sunlight for her great concern over me and my household. she really indeed has been a pillar to my family. i thank you so much for ending the sufferings in my home. my husband wanted to divorce me thinking i am the cause of his problems that he contacted a spell caster and they told him that i am the cause of his darkest moments. i am really happy to share how you bless us unexpectedly even more than we could ever acquired if we were to work for it i thank you mother. for this what you did, if i should give you money, it is not enough..so i praise great jai mata sunlight...... readers my name is kaur middy milas. and i'm residing in texas. on the internet, you will see lots of comments about bringing your ex back. many of them are not real. they will scam you, deceive you and they go for your money. i contact three different spell casters all says different to me. i formed victim for two and the other threatening to kill me if i don't send him money. but when i came to jai sunlight first she advise i applied it's works then i mailed back and tell her the situation is then she said we should use lovespell i obeyed i didn't mind i contacted before but i ended miserably i just believe jai mata sunlight because anytime she talks to me i feel like i am talking to my biological mother. she is really a goddess and a loving mother. if you need help about getting your ex back or maybe other problems you might have while not contact jai mata sunlight? via sunlightmata@gmail.com and expect a perfect change in your life. with lots of testimonies and blessings.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Thank you for your miracle Doctor Osemu Okpamen

    This article is dedicated to the Doctor Osemu Okpamen. I have been married with my wife for 5 years and recently she broke up with me and it hurt me deeply when she told me to leave her alone and that she does not love me anymore when i was always faithful and honest to her. I tried all the ways to get her back buying her what she wants like i always did and she still left me heart broken and she even has a new boyfriend which destroyed me even more until a friend of mine from high school directed me to this genuine spell Doctor called Osemu Okpamen. This man changed my life completely. I followed everything he told me to do and my wife came back begging for me back. I was stunned everything happened exactly like he told me. I had faith in everything he told me and everything was true. Also he was there every moment until i got my happiness back and he also provides spells that cures impotence, bareness, diseases such as HIV/AID E.T.C You can contact him via email at { Doctorokpamenspelltemple@yahoo.com } or visit his website http://www.doctorokpamenspells.com. He will help you in anything you need and quick to answer once you contact him or call me for more info +1 (914)-517-3229.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Hello,
    I Read the article of a very great spell caster and it seems very helpful to me. I haven’t had the chance to have a proper relationship with my ex because we work together. This will be the final week or work and then I wont be around him constantly. Unfortunately, I broke one of the rules in the article and have been sleeping with him. Something I’m not proud of, especially since he has a girlfriend. Not to mention that she’s a girl he dated off and on for 3 years before he dated me.
    When I asked him why he kept sleeping with me even though he was in a relationship, his response was because I wanted it, and he wants me to be happy. But obviously what would make me happy would be to have him all to myself. That was when i read about Dr alexzander on how he help people in saving their relationship and i was really desperate for his help. There were things in our relationship that were tough. We traveled for 4 months right in the beginning, and it was hard due to different expectations. When we returned our living situation was unstable which caused a lot of stress on my end. And when I ask why he didn’t give me a chance to make things better he said he gave me tons of chances. Oh, and he compared our relationship with his past. He says that things were great, and then they went bad really fast, and that why his back with is Ex. Because it at least took them years for things to get that bad. So i was very sad and disappointing and decided to contact this spell caster for help with tears running out of my eyes and Dr alexzander promised to make things right in my relationship and also assured me that my boyfriend is going to come back to me within 78hrs. At first i was shock and didn't believe him because i thought it was impossible to do. But i gave it a try and trusted him. Dr alexzander asked for my details and his, then guarantee me of his return. Truly my ex lover started calling me and also begging me to forgive him and that's his willing to give us a second chance, then promised me never to love any other woman apart from me. it all seem like a miracle to me till now. Dr alexzander. Words can't express how i feel right now. it been 2 month now since you caste that love spell for me and nothing have gone bad between us. his now caring more than ever and also the loving kind of Man i have ever wanted for myself in life. I thank you Dr alexzander for saving my relationship. Indeed you are the best. I want to use this media to share my testimony for the whole world to see and know that there is still hope in your broken relationship, No matter how bad it seems don't give up hope and also contact this man who saved my own. you can reach him through his website address http://alexzanderhightemple-com.webs.com or contact him direct with his email address alexzanderhightemple@gmail.com. I thank you Dr alexzander for helping me and i will always share my testimony in every social media or place i may go to.
    (From United State Of America).
    Mrs Tracy Grilli.
    http://tracygrilli.blogspot.com.tr

    ReplyDelete
  26. Hey!I was in a relationship for quite along time almost 7 years, he cheated with a girl almost 11 years younger than him I took him back because I love him so much. He promised me the world never to leave me never to let me go to make me happy and to make it up to me everyday. 7 weeks later he has broke up with me after a few arguments .. he told me he can’t do it that I’ve ruined everything I deserve it all I’ve treated him bad he gave up his job overseas but he only gave it a week afrer he quit. he has left me in bits and is 1 week later out with other girls please help I don’t know what to do he is telling me he will never ever get back its over and he will never give it a go I have begged and I don’t know why I don’t no why he has done this to me I feel so lifeless… one day in my office going through the internet i saw a post of a lady giving testimony on how she got her husband back,i also come across a blog site on how to reunite and get your ex back with a love spell it was really amazing to see this so i copy his email id on http://happyspelltemple.webs.com/ i explain my situation to him and gave him all the details he requested from me, he give me 3 days assurance that my boyfriend will come back after the spell i was so overwal to hear that so i just keep calm and follow up his order coz i really love my boyfriend and want him back. on the third day after the spell as he promise me, my ex call me also show up in my office begging me to forgive him and accept him back with out no delay, i lift him up with a kiss and was so very happy to have him back all my happiness was from Dr happy he is indeed a true man a father and a god sent. plz contact Dr happy on his email id direct at happylovespell2@gmail.com or call his mobile number on +2348133873774

    ReplyDelete
  27. My name is Claudia Jenna, I almost took my life because of my ex who left me and stop picking my calls. He said do not trust me anymore, I tried to convince him, but he will not believe me until we had a fight and broke up for 8months, after then I realize I can not live without him because of the love I have for him. I tried everything possible to get him back, but non worked for me, some fake spell casters scammed me and went away with my money until I came across this man called Olorun, he cast a spell for me and behold my ex came back after three days, begging me for forgiveness, I was so surprised that spell caster like kabaka still exist. If anyone here needs some help, with all sincerity, contact Olorun via his email: (olorunoduduwaspiritualtemple@gmail.com)

    ReplyDelete
  28. Good day everyone, my name is Mrs. Aaisha Muhammad I have been in a total confusion since my second son attempt to rape a young girl in the next compound and he was arrested and sent to jail since 2014. I have tried so many lawyers and I have seen so many pastors for help but all proved abortive until somebody introduce me to one PA OBA.
    At first I taught all my hope was lost because the lawyers and pastors was not able to help me to bring out my son out of jail. But later I put up courage and I visit http://obastarspell.webs.com, and I saw some testimony from some people that benefit help on the website, I just decide to email him and tell him my problem.
    After few days he replied me and asked some questions and I answer the questions and he told me somethings I need to do and I did everything as he instructed. But now guess what? My son that has been arrested since 2014 has just been released to me on the 21 lats month. This is really amazing.
    If you are have any problem and you are confused and you do not know what to do, just try PA OBA and contact him on obastarspell@gmail.com or visit http://obastarspell.webs.com for more info he can help you out of that your problems.

    ReplyDelete
  29. I never believed in spell casting, but After 6 years of dating, I still imagine how Dr Aza brought my ex lover back to me in just 24 hour. No one could have ever made me believe that there is a real spell caster that really work. am sandra by name,I want to quickly tell the world that there is a real on line spell caster that is powerful and genuine, His name is Dr Aza, He helped me recently to reunite my relationship when my ex lover who left me, When i contacted Dr Aza he cast a love spell for me and my ex lover who said he doesn't have anything to do with me again, he called me and started begging me. he is back now with so much love and caring. today i am glad to let you all know that this spell caster have the powers of bring lovers back. because i am now happy with my lover,and the most surprise,is that our love is very strong,every day is happiness and joy. and there is nothing like been with the man you love.i am so happy my love is back to me with the help of Dr.Aza if you have similar problem i will advice you to contact him ,he is there to help you and put a smile on your face. his email: azaspellcaster@gmail.com or you can whatsApp his line:+2348107155060

    ReplyDelete
  30. Good day everyone, my name is Mrs. Aaisha Muhammad I have been in a total confusion since my second son attempt to rape a young girl in the next compound and he was arrested and sent to jail since 2014. I have tried so many lawyers and I have seen so many pastors for help but all proved abortive until somebody introduce me to one PA OBA.
    At first I taught all my hope was lost because the lawyers and pastors was not able to help me to bring out my son out of jail. But later I put up courage and I visit http://obastarspell.webs.com, and I saw some testimony from some people that benefit help on the website, I just decide to email him and tell him my problem.
    After few days he replied me and asked some questions and I answer the questions and he told me somethings I need to do and I did everything as he instructed. But now guess what? My son that has been arrested since 2014 has just been released to me on the 21 lats month. This is really amazing.
    If you are have any problem and you are confused and you do not know what to do, just try PA OBA and contact him on obastarspell@gmail.com or visit http://obastarspell.webs.com for more info he can help you out of that your problems.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Life is good when you have your love ones around you, I am saying this because when i had issues with my lover i never seen life as a good thing but thanks to Dr. Ogudugu of OGUDUGU TEMPLE, for helping me to cast a spell that brought my lover back to me within the space of 48hours. My husband left me for another woman after 7YEARS of marriage,but Dr.Ogudugu help me cast a spell that brought him back to me within 48hours. I am not going to tell you more details about myself rather i will only advise those who are having issues in there relationship or marriages to contact DR. OGUDUGU TEMPLE through these details via;
    (GREATOGUDUGU@GMAIL.COM) or call him on (+2348142250751).

    ReplyDelete
  32. Super website with a great sharing and amazing stories is ur web.. please keep doing what u do now.. thanks to you.
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